


practice room or confession room

by twoc9pt6ins



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, M/M, dotae, nonAU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-29 21:32:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16751854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twoc9pt6ins/pseuds/twoc9pt6ins
Summary: it’s dotae. what more do you need to know?





	practice room or confession room

**Author's Note:**

> i love dotae so much and i’ve been so deprived lately so this happened 
> 
> pls give kim dongyoung more love
> 
> vroom vroom

It’s been five days since the last time he and Dongyoung acknowledged each other’s presence without a camera filming them. He hasn’t been in the best mood lately and he knows it’s because he misses Dongyoung. The other members are aware they fought but aren’t sure of the reason why. He’s grateful to them for not asking because he honestly doesn’t know what to say.

Taeyong searches for Dongyoung in their practice room and finds him seated beside Jungwoo on the floor. Dongyoung’s always with Jungwoo lately. Taeyong tries not to feel jealous of his own member, but fails miserably. He’s annoyed because for the past few days, he’s not the first person Dongyoung looks for whenever they take a break from practicing. Dongyoung goes to Jungwoo without a second glance at Taeyong and coddles him every time. Before jealousy consumes him again, Taeyong turns away from the two seated boys and calls for the group’s attention.

“We’ll end practice early tonight. You’ve all worked hard,” Taeyong announces. Cheers fill the room and exclamations of “You’re the best, hyung!” convince Taeyong he made the right choice.

Taeyong walks over to Youngho, who’s busy packing up his things just like everyone else.

“Youngho, you guys go ahead to the dorm. I still need to go over some stuff,” Taeyong tells his friend.

“Okay, but come home soon. You also deserve to rest, Yong,” replies Youngho.

“I will. Thank you.” 

Taeyong watches as his members exit the practice room in groups of twos and threes. He doesn’t see Dongyoung leave and he’s left with an ache in his chest at the thought of the younger boy not even checking if he’s following the others home. Taeyong is about to wallow in his longing for Dongyoung again when suddenly the door to the bathroom inside the practice room opens and the object of his affections appears. Dongyoung’s eyes meet Taeyong’s and Taeyong sees surprise and hurt in them. Taeyong can’t bear to see the hurt in Dongyoung’s eyes but he also can’t turn his gaze away from the other boy.

“The others left already. They probably didn’t know you were still here,” Taeyong tells him. He tries his hardest not to run to the other boy and hug him.

“Oh, I told Jungwoo not to wait for me. I wanted to practice for a while more,” Dongyoung says while looking at the ceiling. Taeyong’s about to offer any form of help to him when the younger boy continues, “If you want the room to yourself just say so. I can look for another room or just go back to the dorm already.”

Taeyong’s heart breaks because Dongyoung is clearly avoiding him. Well, he’s known it for the past five days but hearing Dongyoung’s words still hurt like hell.

“You don’t have to go. I won’t bother you,” Taeyong says while turning away from him. He wants to continue looking at the boy he’s missed so much, but he knows he won’t be able stop himself from crying if he does.

Taeyong walks to a corner of the room, puts in his earphones, and plays their latest song. He forces himself to forget about the other boy and practices the whole choreography twice. He’s about to go for a third round when he catches Dongyoung’s movements out of the corner of his eyes. The boy is also practicing their latest choreography but he’s not doing as well as Taeyong. Dongyoung’s always been great at memorizing songs but he struggles with choreographies. Taeyong stops himself from approaching and asking him to practice together. He knows Dongyoung will just say no so he saves himself the heartbreak.

Taeyong is about to return to his own practicing when he sees Dongyoung fall to his knees. His first thought is that the boy has hurt himself but when he doesn’t hear any cries of pain, he realizes he’s okay— physically. Taeyong waits for Dongyoung to move. He waits for any confirmation that the boy is okay beyond the physical aspect. After a few minutes and Dongyoung still hasn’t gotten up, Taeyong decides it’s time to lower his pride and take a chance.

Taeyong strides over to Dongyoung and crouches beside him. Taeyong worries the other boy might push him away but he doesn’t hesitate as he comes closer.

“Dongyoungie, what’s wrong?” Taeyong’s voice is soft and laced with concern.

Upon hearing Taeyong’s voice, Dongyoung lifts his head up and stares at the older boy. Taeyong is relieved to see that there aren’t any tears streaming down Dongyoung’s face but his heart breaks again at the look of defeat and hurt on the boy’s face.

“Do you really care, hyung?” Dongyoung’s question stuns Taeyong. Of course he cares. He’s never stopped caring for Dongyoung.

“Why would you ever think that I don’t care?”

“I’m sorry. I know you care. Just not in the way I wanted you to,” Dongyoung replies. He’s not looking at Taeyong and he thinks that maybe it’s a good thing. Taeyong would never be able to control himself if he were staring into Dongyoung’s eyes.

Hearing Dongyoung’s response sent Taeyong back to that moment five days ago. The moment when Dongyoung told him he cared about him and loved him— not as a member or an older brother or a friend. Dongyoung loved him in a way he didn’t love the other members.

Taeyong remembers clearly how he rejected Dongyoung’s affections. He remembers how he told Dongyoung he had no time for love because he has goals— for himself and for the group. It’s only a memory now but he sees Dongyoung’s pained face as he tells him to direct his love to someone else. Taeyong realizes that for the past five days, Dongyoung’s just been doing what he told him to do. He’s giving Jungwoo the love he reserved for Taeyong which the boy rejected.

“It’s okay, hyung. I don’t expect anything. I already know what you feel,” Dongyoung tells him. 

Taeyong is torn. He wants to tell Dongyoung the truth— the real one this time. But he also knows he has duties as a leader and he can’t be selfish. He just can’t.

“I’m going back to the dorm now, hyung. You should go back soon too,” says Dongyoung. “We have an early schedule tomorrow.”

Taeyong feels rather than sees Dongyoung get up and dust himself off. He’s about to take a step away from Taeyong when the older boy stops him.

Taeyong’s hand circles Dongyoung’s wrist. He looks up and sees Dongyoung staring at their connected hands. There’s surprise and hope written all over Dongyoung’s face and Taeyong marvels at the thought of his small action eliciting such a big response from the boy. In that moment, Taeyong decides he’s human and he’s allowed to be selfish sometimes.

“I don’t have time for love and you don’t either but you still- somehow,” Taeyong hesitates. “You still fell for me.”

“I did.”

“How?” Taeyong knows the answer. He knows it because he did it too; he fell in love with Dongyoung. But he craves Dongyoung’s answer.

“You make time. And then you give it. Because someday, our time will run out and it won’t be up to us to decide when that will happen. So while we still can, we make time and we give it to the people we love,” Dongyoung replies. He’s staring at Taeyong and Taeyong thinks he’s so beautiful. Nobody could ever compare to Dongyoung’s beauty in Taeyong’s eyes.

“But what about our group? What about the members?” Taeyong is afraid of the others resenting them for choosing to feel what they feel for each other.

“They know, hyung. I don’t think I was ever subtle about what I feel for you.”

“And Jungwoo? What if he’s fallen-”

“Fallen for me, hyung?” Dongyoung laughs but Taeyong isn’t amused. “He’s like my little brother and he knows, hyung.”

“Knows what, Dongyoungie?” The nickname paints a smile on Dongyoung’s face and Taeyong swells with love.

“He knows I’ll only ever feel this way for you.”

Dongyoung’s answer steals Taeyong’s breath away and fills his heart at the same time. Taeyong feels like he will burst if he doesn’t hug Dongyoung so he does. He puts his arms around the other boy’s neck and pulls him close. Taeyong nuzzles Dongyoung’s neck and squeezes him tight. He feels Dongyoung’s arms as they embrace him. Taeyong could stay in this position forever.

“I care about you, Dongyoungie. In every way.” It feels so good to finally be able to admit it, Taeyong thinks.

Dongyoung releases Taeyong and holds his face with both his hands.

“Do you mean it, hyung?” There’s longing in Dongyoung’s eyes, Taeyong sees.

“Yes. I mean it now, I will mean it again tomorrow, and I will mean it until you let me.” Taeyong watches as the longing in Dongyoung’s eyes is replaced by love and disbelief.

Dongyoung envelops Taeyong in a hug this time.   
The older boy doesn’t wait to return it and squeezes Dongyoung while hoping that through this, he can make the boy feel how much he truly cares.

Taeyong still thinks he can stay in this position forever.

**Author's Note:**

> as always, thank you for sparing some time to read my works!!
> 
> if you have any requests just dump them below or dm me @jihoonjihooff hehe
> 
> vroom vroom


End file.
